The Effects of Parenting on a Child’s Mental Health

Published on: June 25, 2021
Updated on: June 25, 2025
Author: Kentucky Counseling Center

Parenting is both an incredible privilege and a hefty responsibility. No matter where you live or how you were raised, the goal remains the same: to see your children grow into healthy, happy, and successful adults. But the road to achieving this is often rocky—especially for parents juggling demanding jobs, household chores, and personal challenges. In all the busyness, it’s easy to overlook one critical factor: how your parenting style significantly impacts your child’s mental health.

Below, we’ll explore how a child’s mental well-being can be shaped by parental influences, including adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), parental mental illness, and everyday interactions at home. You’ll also find practical tips on how to protect your child’s emotional wellness—while looking after your own.

Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and Their Impact

Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) are potentially traumatic events that occur during childhood. They can include:

• Experiencing or witnessing violence, neglect, or abuse
• Living with a family member who has mental illness, alcohol or drug problems
• Parental divorce or an unhealthy parental relationship
• Chronic poverty or homelessness
• Emotional neglect or poor parent-child communication
• Traumatic losses or injuries

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), these experiences have been linked to long-term negative impacts on a child’s mental health, such as anxiety, depression, and even a higher risk of substance use. While experiencing ACEs does not guarantee mental health problems, it does increase the likelihood. Quick identification and supportive intervention can mitigate these effects.

How Parents’ Mental Health Affects Children

Research shows that children whose parents have mental illness may experience emotional, behavioral, and psychological problems. Depending on your child’s age and maturity level, it may be difficult for them to understand the parent’s illness. This type of situation is out of the kid’s control but is definitely something parents can manage.

So how do the mental health problems of parents affect child development? Here’s what parents should know.

1. Genetic Link to Mental Illness

One reason parental mental health can influence a child’s emotional well-being is genetics. Researchers have found that certain conditions—like bipolar disorder—may have a hereditary component. However, genetics is only one part of the puzzle. Environmental factors, including supportive or stressful home settings, often play an equally critical role in shaping a child’s mental state.

2. Stress on Children

Kids who see a parent fighting depression or anxiety may internalize stress themselves. If you’re emotionally preoccupied or unavailable, your child may feel unloved, confused, or even responsible for your mood swings. These emotional burdens can hamper your child’s social skills, academic performance, and self-esteem.

3. Mental Health Stigma

Society still harbors stigma around mental illnesses. A child who knows their parent has a mental disorder could fear being judged or bullied if they share it with peers. This sense of secrecy can lead to guilt, shame, and isolation—major risk factors for mental health issues in kids and adolescents.

4. Worry About Parents

Kids are naturally empathetic and concerned about the people they love. If they notice a parent’s mental distress, they might worry excessively—about finances, day-to-day life, and the possibility of losing their parent. This added sense of responsibility may lead them to mature too quickly, missing out on the carefree aspects of childhood.

Reactions Children May Have

1. Anger: They might feel angry at you, blaming you for your illness or resenting you for perceived neglect.
2. Fear: Kids could fear the future, uncertain about whether you’ll always be there for them.
3. Guilt: Some children worry they caused your mental health challenges.
4. Sadness: They may become upset or depressed, especially if major changes at home disrupt routine life.

Balancing Your Mental Wellness with Parenting

Parenting becomes complicated if you’re juggling your own mental health struggles. Yet it’s entirely possible to give your child a secure upbringing, even if you’re contending with depression, anxiety, or other conditions.

1. Seek Professional Help

Your first step is to get treatment—whether through medication, counseling, or both. Consult a licensed counselor or a psychiatrist to manage your mental health symptoms effectively. For families in the United States, the National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) provides resources for finding mental health services.

2. Team Up with Your Partner or Trusted Allies

If you have a spouse or co-parent, share tasks and responsibilities. If you’re a single parent, consider reaching out to relatives or close friends to help lighten the load. Having supportive individuals around can provide the buffer you need to focus on healing.

3. Age-Appropriate Conversations

Explain your mental health condition in a way your child can grasp. Reassure them that you love them, that it’s not their fault, and that you’re addressing the situation with professional help. This transparency often eases children’s anxieties.

Tips to Protect Your Child’s Mental Health

1. Recognize Early Signs of Anxiety or Depression

Kids may not articulate emotions as adults do. Look for red flags such as frequent headaches, changes in eating or sleeping patterns, and extreme mood swings.

2. Maintain Routines

Routine fosters a sense of security for children. Even if your mental state fluctuates, do your best to keep consistent mealtimes, bedtimes, and after-school activities.

3. Encourage Open Communication

Ask your kids, “How was your day?” or “Anything bothering you lately?” Let them know you’re available for honest chats—and truly listen without judgment.

4. Focus on Positive Interactions

Try bonding through simple activities: reading together, playing board games, walking in the park. These small acts help your child feel noticed and loved.

5. Consider Therapy Together

Family counseling or even child therapy can help your kids process any stress or confusion they have. Therapists at Kentucky Counseling Center offer online sessions (telehealth), making professional support more accessible for busy families.