Everyone has an ego, we are all born with it. Ego is important for our self-importance, self-esteem, and self-confidence. Have you had an ego check lately? Is it in the right place or does ego problems are starting to take control of your life?
It’s easy to say “I don’t have ego problems” because admitting it is not easy, it’s like admitting your mistakes. But think of it, if you have self-awareness and the courage to admit you may have ego problems, this will open doors to self-improvement and success.
How to Know if You Have Ego Problems?
Are caught in the ego trap? Here are some signs that you may have ego problems. Be observant of your actions, how you deal with other people every day, and the way you feel in a certain situation. Remember that not all people with ego problems manifest all these attitudes, it may differ.
You Need to Be Right Always
If you’re trying to find ways to justify your actions, even though you know that you’re wrong, this may be a sign that you have an ego problem. Have you ever gotten into an argument where you won’t stop until you say the last words? You get angry or your feelings are hurt when things don’t go your way? Are you offended when someone corrects your mistakes?
You might want to check-in with your ego and figure out why you’re feeling this way. This is not a good trait especially for a leader and a team member. Even feeling vengeful when you lose is a sign you may have ego issues. A person with ego issues will sulk and will have a hard time accepting the loss.
Ignoring Other People’s Feedback even your Partner
Hearing feedback or opinion about you happens at work, at home, or within your circle of friends. If you’ve got problems with your ego, you ignore your partner or other people’s feedback, opinion, advice, and constructive criticism. In a company, there may be a yearly evaluation for employees from your boss or your co-workers.
This feedback gives the employee an opportunity to improve in the workplace. If a person has an ego problem, they’re most likely to ignore it and have a hard time accepting it. Then continue acting the same way instead of improving to pave way for their success.
You Hate Losing Because You Take Care of Your Self-Image
Winning is the key to success, and everybody wants to be a winner. But if you want to be a winner because you hate losing, then there’s something wrong in the picture. If you want to win, you do it in the best interests at heart not because you don’t want anyone else to be superior to you.
If you’re in a competition and you would do anything to be a winner even when it means stepping on someone’s toes, check in with your ego. Why are you feeling this way? Why do you have that urge to win just to be on top even if you’re hurting other people along the way? Is there any other strategy to reach your goal without the thought of “I hate losing”?
The Need That You Always Must Have More
A person with ego issues may have insecurity problems. What does this mean? Always wanting to have more. You see a co-worker with a new phone, you get the latest one. A friend went on a Bahamas cruise, you go on a much expensive vacation. You see someone with the latest designer shoes, you go and get it. This all is okay when you can afford it.
But when these materialistic things are way above your pay-grade and the credit card bills keep on piling up just to get ahead of everyone else, then this may be a problem. It’s not only about materialistic things but with other factors as well. The ‘my kid is better than yours’ competition, or the need to brag and make up a lie to sound like you always have more is something you need to work on.
How to Take Control of Your Ego?
When you’re unable to take control of your ego problems, it may affect your relationships at home, in the workplace, or even with your partner. Here are some tips on how to take control of your ego:
- Practice Self-awareness: One of the first steps to address an inflated ego is to practice self-awareness. This means being aware of your actions, acknowledging your thoughts feelings, and behavior. When you’re more aware of how you act, think, or speak, you may be able to have the right discernment on how you can improve yourself.
- Learn how to accept your mistakes: Everyone commits mistakes and it’s normal. Learn how to be humble and accept your mistakes. Having the courage to apologize is a step to self-improvement.
- Relax and don’t take things personally: Sometimes, our ego gets hurt because we take things personally. Just relax, when it’s about work, don’t get hurt about other people’s comments. Instead, take it as an inspiration to do better.
- Pause and think twice: Before engaging yourself in an argument or making a comment, pause and think twice. Do not say or do something that you might regret. If you have practiced self-awareness, you may be able to know the actions you need to control in order to tame your ego problems.
Just so you know, no one wants to hang out with a person with ego problems. If you need someone to brainstorm with you and figure out why you’re having these strong feelings, you can always talk to a therapist. You may have feelings of suppressed anger or unresolved issues that make you feel that way. Don’t be a victim of an oversized ego, because you know you’re better than this.